Monday, October 8, 2018

Waitress Repetition

Working as a waitress poses a special set of problems. I mean, I’m working with the public, and that is always interesting, to say the least. Now, before you read this, I want to make sure you understand that I truly love my job and I love the people I serve. However, sometimes they kind of make one wonder.

I begin at each table by saying something along this order, “Tonight our feature is the eight ounce sirloin. It’s an amazing cut of Angus. It comes with either a cup of soup or a salad and then your choice of potato, vegetable, or rice. Our soup tonight is loaded baked potato and it is absolutely delicious.”

The first person orders, “I’ll take the sirloin.”
ME: Excellent choice. How would you like that done, sir?
MAN 1: Medium.
ME: Would you care for the loaded baked potato soup or a salad?
MAN 1: What kind of soup do you have tonight?
ME: We have a wonderful loaded baked potato soup. It has onion, cheese, bacon and sour cream in it. It’s very, very good.
MAN 1: I’ll have the salad.
ME: Okay. Caesar or house? The house salad comes with your choice of dressing.
MAN: I’ll have the house salad.
ME: And what kind of dressing would you like with your salad?
MAN 1: Oh. I’ll have ranch, please.
ME: Ranch, perfect. Now, would you like a potato, vegetable or rice? Our potato choices are baked, French fries or hashed browns.
MAN 1: What kind of potatoes do you have?
ME: We have baked, French fries and hashed browns.
MAN 1: I’ll take the baked.
ME: Ok, great. Now ma’am, what can I get for you?
LADY: I’ll have the sirloin.
ME: And how would you like it done?
LADY: I’ll take it medium.
ME: Would you care for soup or salad with that?
LADY: What kind of soup do you have tonight?
ME: We have a yummy loaded baked potato soup.
LADY: I’ll take the salad. I don’t like soup.
ME: Would you like the Caesar or the house salad?
LADY: I’ll have the house.
ME: What kind of dressing would you like with your salad?
LADY: I’ll have ranch.
ME: Would you like a potato, vegetable or rice with that?
LADY: What kind of potatoes do you have?
ME: We (still) have baked, French fries and hashed browns.
LADY: I’ll have the baked.
ME: Thank you. And now for you, sir. What can I get you:
SIR: What’s the special tonight?
ME: Our feature is the eight ounce sirloin. It’s an amazing cut of Angus. It comes with either a cup of soup or a salad and then your choice of potato, vegetable, or rice. Our soup tonight is loaded baked potato and it is absolutely delicious.
SIR: Are your steaks any good?
ME: Yes sir, we are frequently told they are the very best. Even by our Twin Cities customers who are used to dining at the really nice steak restaurants.
SIR: Ok. I’ll take the pasta.
ME: That’s also a great choice. Which pasta would you like, sir? (I then point to the pasta listings in the menu.)
SIR: Oh, I don’t know. I guess I’ll have the shrimp Fresca. Except I don’t care for shrimp or tomatoes, so could you leave those out?
ME: Absolutely. Would you care for soup or salad with that?
SIR: What kind of soup do you have tonight?
ME: (Let me go check with the kitchen. By now we may not have the loaded baked potato soup anymore.) We have a wonderful baked potato soup tonight.
SIR: What’s in that?
ME: Well, potatoes, sour cream, onions, cheese and bacon. You know. Like a loaded baked potato.
SIR: Do you have any other soup choices:
ME: No sir, not tonight.

Now, so far I’ve only gotten orders from three or the six people at the table. Suffice it to say that about now my buzzer is going crazy, letting me know that I have food in the kitchen that needs to be taken to another table. Undaunted, I continue on. I will not repeat the next three orders because they will be variations on they three I’ve just taken. And then when I’ve got all the orders, the first person will change his mind. I do not find this surprising, as by the time I get done getting all six orders, he’s had plenty of time to change his mind several times over, right? 

Of course, I know that my customers are out for the evening to visit with friends and family and their first priority is not food, but chatting. I totally get that. But trust me. This column will be continued at a later date. There are many other interesting things to write about when you are a waitress.


1 comment:

  1. I would probably be one of those you would have to repeat for as well. I usually look at the menu and then forget whatever else was said. So please forgive me if I ever do that to you. I do know that waitressing is a job I would not like at all. So I applaud you who do it.

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